Pornography is one of the most destructive forces of our time. It warps intimacy, fuels trafficking, and shatters lives. Yet when the church talks about porn, it’s almost always framed as a men’s issue. Women are left out of the conversation and left to struggle in silence.

I know because I lived it.

My Story of Addiction and Shame

I was first exposed to pornography at just five years old. What began as curiosity turned into an addiction that gripped me for decades.

By the time I was an adult, I carried crushing shame. I believed I was the only woman binging porn. I thought, Why am I like this? Isn’t this supposed to be a man’s problem? Am I disgusting? Irredeemable?

The shame became heavier than the porn itself. And shame is exactly where the enemy wanted me.

The Turning Point: Facing Trafficking

For years I kept consuming until one day I could no longer ignore the reality: much of what I watched likely involved human trafficking, abuse, and even minors.

As someone who had my own autonomy stolen, groomed and then molested at six, trapped in abusive relationships, I couldn’t look at that reality and keep going.

So I convinced myself I could consume “better.” I switched to so-called “ethical” porn: reading smut, paying for subscriptions, and supporting user-generated content. But no matter how I dressed it up, it was still sin.

Jesus made it clear:

“But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”
Matthew 5:28 (ESV)

There is no such thing as holy lust.

The Enemy’s Lies and Our Arrogance

Here’s what I’ve learned: Satan doesn’t use 100% lies. He twists the truth, just like he did in Genesis 3. Ninety percent truth, ten percent lie and suddenly the whole world is corrupted.

That’s exactly how he keeps us bound. He tells us: You’re the only one. You’re too far gone. God can forgive anyone but you.

But believing those lies is more than despair, it’s arrogance. It’s saying, God, my sin is bigger than Your redemption. I’m the one person You can’t heal.

We need to repent not only of the sin but also of the arrogance of believing our brokenness is stronger than His grace.

Trauma, Abuse, and Identity

Porn wasn’t the only bondage in my story. From childhood abuse to abusive relationships, I grew up believing my only worth was in what I could give someone physically. And even then, I thought I wasn’t good enough.

That lie, you are worthless, was written deep into me. It fueled my addiction and convinced me I couldn’t be free.

But God had other plans.

God’s Preservation in the Midst of Despair

There were years I tried to end my life. More than once. I believed God was disgusted with me, that He was done with me, and I didn’t want to keep going.

But every attempt failed. The Lord quite literally kept me alive. If the enemy had won, I wouldn’t be here today with an eleven-year-old son, about to marry the man of my dreams, and walking in obedience.

This is why I’m so passionate. Because I know what’s at stake.

Why Community Matters

Shame thrives in secrecy. The enemy isolates us so we stay stuck.

But healing happens in community. I’ve seen it in my own life, I even met my best friend in an online business mastermind. Back then, neither of us was walking closely with God. Today, we talk daily and often co-work on Zoom to stay accountable (thank You, Lord, for body doubling and ADHD coping strategies!).

If God could use that space to build accountability and friendship, imagine what He can do when women of God come together specifically to break chains.

Reclaiming Space from the Enemy

That’s why I’m launching a free challenge called Your First 7 Days Free on October 13, 2025.

The first week of quitting porn is the hardest, and you don’t have to do it alone. For seven days, you’ll receive:

• Morning and evening private podcast episodes.
• Daily prompts to keep you focused.
• Weekly email encouragement and support.
• A private Instagram broadcast channel, because the enemy has used Instagram as a source of temptation, and we’re going to take it back for Jesus.

➡️ Join the waitlist here.

This isn’t a magic cure. It’s a starting point. But it’s a place to step out of isolation, into truth, and into the freedom Christ already purchased for you.

Breaking Generational Curses

This fight isn’t just about us. If you have kids, chances are they’ve already been exposed to pornography before kindergarten.

If we don’t confront this now, we pass the cycle on. Porn destroys marriages. Porn destroys children. Porn destroys nations.

I believe it’s at the root of much of the spiritual decay in the U.S. and in the U.K., where my fiancé is from. The more I see, the more convinced I am: lust and pornography are destroying both nations.

But it doesn’t have to continue. In Christ, we have authority to break those generational curses.

Conclusion: Hope for the Broken

I was addicted for over 25 years. Today, I am free, not because of my strength, but because of God’s. If He could redeem my story, He can redeem yours too.

You are not beyond His reach. You are not too dirty, too far gone, or too broken. Porn doesn’t get the final word. Shame doesn’t get the final word.

Jesus does.

And if you’re ready to take the first step, I’d love to walk alongside you. Join me and other women who are saying enough is enough. Let’s reclaim our freedom together.

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